Friday 29 January 2016

#14.

https://youtu.be/cabK5xzIFes

We're all facing daily battles but right now, I'm ready to fight back now. No longer am I going to let my emotions be controlled on what people's perceptions of me are. I have a tendency to call people 'slags' like obviously I don't go up to people and be like 'you're a slag' I'll just be having a conversation to my boyfriend and be like people are such slags aka dickheads whatever you wanna call them, but the thing is I'm not actually as big of a dickhead as I make out, I just don't want to get close to people for them to leave me again.
I get worried that I'm gonna say the wrong thing or they're just gonna up and leave but I've got to stop being such a dick to people, because although I act like a confident person but I'm so insecure it's unbelievable.

TODAY IS THE DAY SHIT IS CHANGING.

No more am I gonna mope about when someone says someone they know fucking hates me, no more am I going to get mad over pointless shit. All of YOU control your happiness and I promise you that no matter how rocky it gets it gets so much better. Please just trust yourself, you'll feel so much better.

I'm actually really happy right now, and I'm excited about my future and I', really excited about sharing my future with my very handsome boyfriend and most of all I'm showing YOU the reader that even though you're probably in a really crappy place right now, it gets better.. so so much better.

Please never give up, I never gave up so many times when I was ill and if I hadn't of thought 'shit I'll wait and see if it gets atleast a teeny bit better'  I waited, and waited.. and FUCKING WAITED!!!! It took months, years even to get where I am now but to be honest I wouldn't change any of it. I'm stronger than I think, and I know that someone out there can relate to this and YOU boo are so much more stronger than you think!

Ox